farfromfearless
What If I Have To Stop?
As I mentioned yesterday, this weekend - today actually - is my twelve-year wedding anniversary. Last night, my wife and I enjoyed a nice meal and then had some drinks with friends.
Somewhere in the process of all of that, I badly hurt my right thumb.
I have no idea how, or what happened. All I know is this morning I woke up and it was painful to the point where I initially thought it was broken. It isn’t, but the pain is severe and sharp. It was bad enough that I had to go get it strapped.
It’s amazing how you take something like your thumbs completely for granted, but how essential they are to pretty much everything you do. Really basic things like tying your shoelaces, opening a bottle of drink or even typing on a keyboard become really awkward processes when you can’t use your thumb. And when pain is involved, quite miserable ones, too. Yes, it hurts to type.
It also hurt to run. The strap helped - without it just walking fast was uncomfortable - but my thumb of course is still bouncing around and it wasn’t the most pleasant experience.
Splits and chart:
The run, in fact, was awful - one of my worst to date. While I’m not hungover, I feel utterly exhausted and have done all day. I’ve craved salt and grease since waking up and subsequently have made pretty poor food choices. My legs are still tired from Friday.
It was everything I could do to even get myself out the door.
Still, it’s done. However, the events of the past 24 hours have got me thinking about a couple of things:
- I need to be extremely careful not to jeopardise all of this by doing something dumb
- What happens if something really bad happens and I have to stop?
Runner Girl made a comment this afternoon which I’ve been contemplating ever since:
Since injuries seem to be on my mind lately, how do you keep yourself safe without taking rest days?
I replied to her directly in the comments area, basically suggesting that barring some catastrophe I don’t really see running-related injuries being a problem until my mileage gets quite a bit higher. And when that happens, I’ll be extra careful to do all the sensible things like regularly icing my knees after runs, and so on.
However, what do I do if something major happens? Something random, that isn’t caused by logging endless miles on the road? I mean, what if last night I’d been out, drunk a bit too much (as I did), and instead of hurting my thumb, I’d badly twisted my ankle? Or somebody attacked me in the street? Or I was hit by a car? Or a million other highly unlikely but still uncomfortably possible things? 
The point is, of course, you can worry yourself to death over nothing. Chances are I’ll be fine. However, I can really increase those good odds by being mindful that I avoid putting myself into situations where bad things can happen to good runners. Or, at least, a runner trying to be good.
I mean, I had fun last night and it was nice (and important) to celebrate this occasion with my wife, but the injury to my thumb just underlines how ridiculously easy it is to slip up if you’re not being totally attentive. I can’t live my life obsessing about the possible risk in every little thing but I can make a real effort not to do really dumb things. Like getting drunk.
I don’t drink much nowadays as it is, both by choice and because knowing that I always have to run means that it isn’t really an option. And I’m also one of those people who doesn’t enjoy ‘a beer’. If I have a beer, I want another one. Not to a point where I’m an alcoholic or always end up comatose, but I’d rather not have one beer or one glass of wine. I’d rather skip it altogether. And then every so often, I’ll plan a night out and have a few beers then. So it’s very easy for me to just not do that, or to do it very rarely. And from now on when it does happen, when I am out with friends, I need to set myself fixed limits, and even then be very mindful of how I’m behaving and whether I’m potentially putting myself in any kind of risky situation.
But let’s say I am always super-careful but one day something happens that means I am physically unable to run. What then? What do I do with ‘this’? It’s only really in the last couple of days I’ve considered the magnitude of what I’m doing here. I mean, there’s no possible way I’m ever going to skip a day because I’m tired or sick or something like that. But if I broke an ankle, as an example, it’s over. I mean, it might not even be one day - it might be a week or a month.
If that happens, all of this would be toast.
That sounds pretty bad now, but it would be absolutely awful if I’d reached day 100, or day 166, or day 243.
Or day 364.
I mean, imagine that. How crushing would that be?
The thing is, there’s absolutely nothing I can do about it. So really, why worry? You can’t plan for fate or bad luck. I can, as above, do my very best not to be stupid and injure myself for some dumb reason - that would really suck, and I’d be seriously pissed at myself, probably forever. But if something totally random happens - say a tile from a roof falls on my head - there is nothing I can do about it. No amount of preparation is going to prevent something like that.
And you can’t live life obsessing about the random.
However, I’m curious - say I put my foot in a ditch and twisted an ankle or something on day #231, or I have some kind of emergency situation and cannot even contemplate announcing, “Right, I’ll be back in 20 minutes…” and I had to take a day off. How would you guys feel about that? If I picked it up the next day and then finished it through the full 365, would that be good enough, or would you consider the project a failure?
More importantly perhaps - would I?
Really - I’m interested in your thoughts. Thanks.
8 people have left comments
Andrew is getting fit said:
To tell you the truth I don’t read this site because of the running everyday for a year thing. I read it because I find your insights and ups and downs interesting.
Sometimes things happen that get in the way of our goals. To me, it’s not so important that you complete it perfectly first time. Rather it’s important that even when you get knocked down by life you manage to get up again and then complete it.
I think it will be close to a miracle if you can do all 365 days without picking up an injury. But I’m hoping you do!
Spartan7 said:
What if?
I somehow feel like you are one of those guys who always “accomplishes the mission.” You had a bad day or two, and of course you’ve got the what ifs going through your mind. Completely understandable.
But in the next few days, your going to have a great run again. Your spirits will be boosted, your times will improve and you’ll be on top of the world. Ride that wave when it hits.
For me, running is like a roller coaster, and I also hit a low point yesterday. (Maybe we are on the same male PMS cycle!) I know that I want to get out there and run my recovery run, but I’m going to give my legs, lungs and body more than the normal 24 hours I would give it.
You’ll recover, we all do. the difference between people who recover and those that don’t is the people who don’t recover usually quit. You’re not going to quit.
You’ll find some other way to do and exercise, even with an injury … I went to elliptical when I pulled tendons going to my calf. I went to it again when I pulled the ligament going to my big toe.
Two years ago I broke my foot ‘after’ completing the Infantry Confidence Course in Drill Sergeant School. I performed my last module, on one leg, before leaving with a new report date. a month later, with the first injury healing nicely I was playing with my kids and my other foot slid into a door frame and also broke. Drill Sergeant was in my deck of cards I guess and I returned to a unit to go back to Iraq for a third tour.
I was actually happier to be going oversea to again do my job. And I got there because I wouldn’t quit. On two healing feet, I ran in the units 4 mile run, and came to the finish line in the top 10%
If you have to go to biking or the elliptical, so what. You’re not going to fail because of that.
Keep it up and you’ll be riding that wave again soon.
Blaine Moore said:
This is why I don’t worry about running streaks and schedule days off; I don’t have to worry about breaking the streak and life can feel free to interfere without breaking anything. I might go 2 or 3 or 4 weeks without taking a day off from running, but if something comes up and it isn’t in my best interest then I can skip the run without feeling guilty.
Shéamus said:
@ Andrew - Cheers. As said, I’m not really worried about my mental conitioning or whether I’ll pick up any running-related injuries. Things like that - touching wood, and hoping I don’t totally now jinx it - just don’t seem to happen to me. But as in my post it’s only recently it’s dawned on me that I have no control over totally random events, but do need to ensure I’m more careful, pretty much at all times, so as not to encourage bad luck.
I also really need to move to a morning run system when I get back from the States. With the run out of the way earlier, there’s less chance of ‘the day’ ruining things.
@ Spartan7 - Cheers man. As said, your comment got me totally back on the saddle. And that’s an incredible story.
@ Blaine - Yes, normally I wouldn’t advocate doing something like this, but that is the entire challenge, after all, to do it every single day for one year. After that’s done, I imagine I’ll resume a more normal on/off pattern, if only because I think you do need regular 48-hour rest breaks once you move up to the major mileage.
Pete @ Quicktofit said:
Injuries can be a complete drain on your will to keep going.. I know. I was working out pretty hard last year when I tore my rotator cuff while working on a home improvement project. Because I tore the rotator cuff i was unable to keep lifting weights for my upper body. It was a huge hit on my motivation and I know I struggled with things for a while.
By the same token, having some time off from working out had me chomping at the bit, wanting to get back in the game. It was very motivating after a little while.
In the end I came back from the injury (6 months later) and now the shoulder is stronger than ever!
Shéamus said:
I tore my rotator cuff a few years back doing push-ups, of all things, while warming up ahead of what was going to be a heavy set of military presses.
This is why I always wince when I read about this 100 Push-Up program that everybody seems to be doing… 
As you say, it took months to get my confidence back in the gym. Now I don’t go to the gym at all. Life! Who can explain it?
Michelle said:
I gotta tell you, i am very inspired by you! I would love to do something like this, i am just not sure! I am in my 40’s now and running unfortunately doesn’t get easier as we get older, or does it???
Just go for it dude! Don’t worry about LIFE! If something happens, it happens! It’s a challenge, a goal…you can do it!!!
Shéamus said:
Thanks Michelle. I think one of the few plusses about starting to run in your late 30s/early 40s is this for many people is typically where your endurance levels are at their peak. I’m comfortable knowing I will never be a sub-30 minute 10k runner, but I do know I can run a sub 3:30 marathon (or will, at some point), and more.
I think assuming one is reasonable healthy and doesn’t have any serious medical problems it’s never too late to start running. Physically, of course, it’s all good, but I think the mental and spiritual aspects of the sport are far more rewarding.
Get out there!
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